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The Stories I Still Believe

by Flagrant Orange

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1.
These are the stories… Of the sadness and joy that haunts our dreamless nights... Of the relationships we can’t seem to leave though we don’t know why… Of the edges and boundaries of our hopes and fears… Of the thousand tiny fragments of our aching and broken hearts that still hold out for the fairy tale ending… Of finally saying “no” when we don’t really know how... Of lying awake at night and wondering why… Of the ghosts that haunt our cluttered minds for so long that we count them as friends… Of the things that we will sacrifice for moments of pleasure despite the pain… Of the ephemeral juxtaposition of our lives… And of the attempts to hold it all, the need for two opposing things - connection and independence - at the same time. These are the stories of the pieces of ourselves that we’ve left behind or erased and that have finally come back to the light. These are stories I still believe...
2.
Rose 03:27
A single red balloon Blown by the breeze Torn from her hand when she fell And scraped her knee. She sees the sliver moon Before the dawn And ravens keep on singing Her favorite song. Rose, Rose What are you doing here? Rose, Rose What else could you fear? Standing on the Hawthorne Watching the lights And the little paper boat she dropped Drifts into the night She has been gone so long And has so far to go But is the world flat or round? She still doesn’t know Rose, Rose What are you doing here? Rose, Rose What else could you fear? She opens up the doll Only to find There is another smaller one Hiding inside A single red balloon Blown by the breeze Torn from her hand when she fell And scraped her knee. Rose, Rose What are you doing here? Rose, Rose What else could you fear? Rose, Rose Your love is all you own Rose, Rose And you were never alone
3.
Gut Punch 04:37
Sitting on the corner of Burnside and Nine As the world passes by No one looks and no one turns around And you won’t give them a chance to let you down No they can’t wound you, cause you’ve already wounded yourself And there’s no blood left to bleed. No they can’t hurt you, cause you’re already hurting yourself And the gut punch leaves you so you cannot breathe. Mama told you do not let them see you cry So you only cry inside Always searching for your redemption In among the list of all of your transgressions No they can’t wound you, cause you’ve already wounded yourself And there’s no blood left to bleed. No they can’t hurt you, cause you’re already hurting yourself And the gut punch leaves you so you cannot breathe. No they can’t wound you, cause you’ve already wounded yourself And there’s no blood left to bleed. No they can’t hurt you, cause you’re already hurting yourself And the gut punch leaves you so you cannot breathe. No they can’t wound you, cause you’ve already wounded yourself And there’s no blood left to bleed.
4.
Is this the 5th circle All I see is greed Is this Heaven or Hell? Or somewhere in between? The leaky ship goes down I hear the people scream Where is the hero now? This is a new regime Breakaway – Try to break free Breakaway – Try to break free Breakaway – Try to break free Breakaway False prophets fill the air With constant litany Believing what we hear But blind to all we see Breakaway – Try to break free Breakaway – Try to break free Breakaway – Try to break free Breakaway Below the 5th circle Is only fraud and schemes I wish that this were Hell But it’s reality Fear is everywhere Stealing all our dreams This is not our place It’s not our destiny Breakaway – We can break free Breakaway – We can break free Breakaway – We can break free Everybody’s in a deadly dream -- They don’t wanna hear people scream Everybody’s in a deadly dream -- They don’t wanna hear people scream Everybody’s in a deadly dream -- They don’t wanna hear people scream Everybody’s in a deadly dream -- They don’t wanna hear people scream
5.
Love Song 03:21
Don’t know the singer or the band, but I know the words ‘cause the song is sad. Don’t remember what I should, And I can’t forget what I wish I could. Each ending, every start Just more graffiti on my heart. All of the little boxes We carry a heavy load All of the little boxes Why can’t we just let go All of the little boxes Our broken dreams inside All of the little boxes Show me yours, I’ll show you mine I am Alice crying at the crossroads, The Cheshire Cat he laughs at my woes. He says, “Alice, don’t you know? “You take the path where you want to go?” All of the little boxes We carry a heavy load All of the little boxes Why can’t we just let go All of the little boxes For scars that we would hide All of the little boxes Show me yours, I’ll show you mine I’ve nailed my left hand tight. Will you help me nail the right? So many times, I have been wrong, But I still fall for love songs. I still fall… All of the little boxes We carry a heavy load All of the little boxes Why can’t we just let go All of the little boxes Is there still hope to find? All of the little boxes Show me yours, I’ll show you mine
6.
Box Canyons 04:38
There are ghosts In the box canyons of my mind Calling my name And yet I wander, I’m so blind I don’t sleep And I can’t get up out of bed Can’t stop listening To your voice ringing in my head It’s too loud Can’t hear what you said There’s all these echoes Echoes in the empty space Echoes in the empty space Echoes in the empty space Your ghosts haunt me Now they linger in the day All these memories Why can’t I make them go away? It’s too loud I can’t hear you now There’s only echoes Echoes in the empty space Echoes in the empty space Echoes in the empty space Echoes in the empty space you left when you went away Echoes in the empty space you left when you went away Echoes in the empty space you left when you went away Echoes in the empty space
7.
On the Brink 03:04
I’m here unarmed Temper made you a knife so sharp Surgical steel drawing lines within ourselves Finding the limits by Ignoring the warning signs Forging straight ahead and falling over The edge of me Where is the edge of me? On the brink of ecstasy Paper tigers you gave me Lies that only one of us believed The coffee shop where we used to go And I don’t even look away no more At the end when you ask me Was it all worth it? I will say yes And I will say no. The edge of me Where is the edge of me? On the brink of ecstasy The edge of me Where is the edge of me? On the brink of ecstasy
8.
Shadow 03:40
The child inside me she hides her tears And her dreams, her dreams are my, my worst fears. Walking through windows wondering why I bleed, And this pain is everything I ever need. Shadow A shadow Shadow I am a shadow Tissue paper castles I’ve built in the sand, Who will save me when I’ve burned all the plans. Crooked lines scribbled on paper that’s wadded up and thrown away…. Fucking garbage men think they rule the world, anyway Shadow A shadow Shadow I am a shadow I am a shadow A past illuminated only by the stars And all the memories live in my scars Colored bits, jagged edges, I cannot see Everything has become gray inside of me. Shadow A shadow I am a shadow My own, my own, my own shadow
9.
Salt and lime on your fingers White Russians on my tongue Secrets whispered late at night When we were young Kisses that were merely promises And a gaze that held me tight But I never did understand What were you trying to fight? I did everything I could think of Plus a hundred things more But that never stopped you From walking out that door. It was a cold and rainy night The last time You drove out of my life You left me Sitting in the dark For the hundredth time Now I’m not waiting for A hundred one A hundred one A hundred one Did you ever love me? And do I love you still? I’m taking back my heart Moving out on my own My dream’s unfulfilled You didn’t understand me But I guess that makes two Cause I never did Get You It was a cold and rainy night The last time You drove out of my life You left me Standing in the dark For the hundredth time Now I’m not waiting for A hundred one A hundred one A hundred one A hundred one A hundred one A hundred one A hundred one A hundred one
10.
Remember the summer We didn’t go outside Remember the summer No place to hide Remember the summer We wanted change Remember the summer Nothing was the same And everything was hurting And everything was hurting Remember the summer It was the end Remember that summer It was us or them Remember that summer Nothing was the same Remember that summer We looked for change And everything was hurting And everything was hurting And everything was hurting Strike the match, burn it all down Strike the match, burn in all down Remember the summer. Remember the summer. Remember the summer. Remember the summer. It’s gonna rain Until the summer. It’s gonna rain Until the summer. It’s gonna rain Until the summer. It’s gonna rain
11.
Chasm 06:49
There is a chasm in your eyes – I’m hypnotized You are a demon in disguise – and I am blind Am I the fire you’ll ignite? – We’re intertwined ‘Cause I can’t avoid the chasm … In your eyes In your eyes I’m paralyzed By the chasm In your eyes….. Enticed to heartbreak, it’s no surprise – there’s only lies You cut me deep and twist the knife – I can’t survive The ship is sinking, rising tide – it’s suicide And I am your willing … Sacrifice Your sacrifice I’ll pay the price For the chasm In your eyes I’m falling I’m falling I’m falling into the chasm … In your eyes In your eyes I’ll pay the price For the chasm In your eyes

credits

released December 11, 2021

Lyrics & Vocals: Misty Nikula
Guitars: Eric Crowfoot & Jeremy Fanders
Bass: Jeremy Fanders & Eric Crowfoot
Drums: Jeremy Philpott
Keys: Matt Bugado

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Flagrant Orange Portland, Oregon

Flagrant Orange is an indie rock band from Portland Oregon.
Flagrant Orange’s songs try to capture the love, loss, loneliness and need to connect that define the human condition. Ones that only a privileged white girl from Olympia and a poor brown guy who came of age on the punk scene in Berkeley could possibly create. ... more

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